NOVEMBER - GILLINGHAM FC.
A historic clash of footballing titans, The Gills verses The Tangerines.
JB did a sterling job of booking GASS two directors boxes which accommodated exactly 20 guests. Got that? 20, dead. We have 22 members.
Andy did the right thing and actually let us know he was not coming. That left 21 members. Now having been one of the meetings organised for yonks please believe me when I say if we have 21 potential members left to make a meeting - WE NEVER GET 21!. Never. Ever. It is always less.
Unless of course there is an absolute limit of 20 for the venue. Then we get 21. Of course we do. Freezing cold night, middle of winter, only a poxy buffet, no draught beer. Of course we get bloody 21. Why wouldn't we?
Cue JB looking very, very fraught. Cue Len coming in last because Blackheart jogged in just three feet in front of him knowing that the last one in was out - if you follow me. Cue JB somehow managing to sneak Len into the box - and trust me again here, nobody sneaks a man of Len's admirable stature in anywhere, but John managed it.
Having had a few in The Factory bar down below we then drank our way through the mini bar and scoffed our way straight through the buffet before heading out onto the terrace for the first half of the 'kicking a pigs bladder round and round' game.
You can see for yourselves the sheer manic excitement and the total absorption in the game exhibited by our boys. "Up the Gills, wotcha doin' Ref, you blind? Gercha, cow son. etc. etc (and that was all Ron).
10 minutes in and we lost interest.
Time to go back into the two boxes and see if, having paid our monthly fee of just £40 each towards the £1,100 box fee, the £250 bar bill downstairs and the £250 bar bill from the mini bar (£1,600 divided by 21 = £76.19 each) - we could not find a way to order expensive wines individually and avoid paying for them.
What sport, its such a laugh. Having had £76 worth of value for a £40 input why not stripe the bill up further?
Guys, this cannot go on. I'm not going to keep whinging on about it so let's go for it properly. Everyone order what they want, when they want it. Get that Chateau Margaux opened, what? a bottle, I meant a magnum my man!!
In about three months GASS will be finished and we can call it a day. OR - if you want more than house wine or beer - PLEASE - just pay for it yourselves.
The picture on the left shows Tony being taken away by security. I called them myself. He was guilty of drinking a glass on non-house wine. Trust me, I will not be thwarted on this. Pay £40, Expect £40! Tony got 36 hours community service and a criminal record - it could be you next.
We also had a mini meeting where Chairman Graham managed to square an impossible circle and got everyone to vote for not one, but two Christmas GASS events. The first is at Langans for lunch for 15 on Monday 3rd December which is a "Non-GASS" event (you pay your own way). The second is at Kits Coty for Christmas dinner on Tuesday 4th December which, because it the first Tuesday of the month, an evening and can take 22, the official GASS meeting.
Amazingly everyone voted for it and so please go straight to the December page and pre-order from the Kits Coty Christmas menu (which is very good by the way). PRE-ORDER MY LOVERLY GRUB
GASS is paying for the Kits Coty meeting so lest have a good turnout. The members who are enjoying lunch together at Langans are lised on the December page.
We also had a couple of good meetings suggestions for next year:
CHEESE ROLLING COMPETITION: That should be a blast, decent hill, lots of round cheeses, nice pub nearby.
CRAZY GOLF IN BRICK LANE: Round of golf in this 'City Boy' party place then on for a Ruby Murry.
THE SLIDE AT THE OLYMPIC PARK: One for the summer where it doesn't close on us this time.