SEPTEMBER - AGM - ALBANIA
Updated: Sep 28
This year the members decided to go a bit off piste and try somewhere a bit more off the beaten track for a change. So we alighted on the idea of visiting Albania, Tirana to be precise. Looks nice, doesn't it............................
MINUTES OF THE AGM MEETING AT THE END OF THIS BLOG
One of the charms of travelling with GASS in days of yore was the pure stupidity evinced by our members. On the way out to our venue we could include literally forgetting passports, mislaying tickets, guns in luggage (admittedly fake, but a gun none the less to an X-ray machine), I could go on.
On the way back in the coach from the hotel to the airport we would award the Mannequin Pis, a small sculpture of the little boy having a Jimmy in Brussels. Awarded for the most stupid act by any member on the trip. And boy were there some stupid acts over the years. Some even death defying, some just plain bonkers.
But no more. Most groups as they get older start to lose the plot. This lot just seem to get wiser and craftier. No-one was late to the airport at awful o'clock in the morning, everyone made the gate (even if Len had to scamper the last 500 yards by dint of a slight lack of appreciate of how far the gate was - and if you have never seen Len scamper then trust me, it's a sight for sore eyes).
That just left the trip itself as a venue for things to go wrong, but we failed. Everything went right. Well apart from one row of very tolerant passengers not getting the luxury of extra legroom on the flight courtesy of Ryanair re configuring the plane to suit themselves, not us (Mannequin Pis alert 1).
Great hotel, The Rogner. Built in the early 90's when communism collapsed, it is still a lovely spot. City centre venue, beautiful tropical gardens round their pool and bar (a GASS must-have facility). Excellent food and top quality staff. A perfect base for four days rest and relaxation.
The first night we enjoyed a walking tour of the centre with Leku, our Albanian fixer. Leku walked us from bar to bar to restaurant where we tried out the value-for-money aspects of visiting Tirana. Cheap as chips!!! Leku regaled us with tales of just how much fun it was living under the communist regime her grew up in until the fall in 1992. How he and his mates would inform on their parents, happily starve most of the time, and generally live in a medieval time warp while the rest of the world (North Korea excepted) went about modernising. We pointed out that Tirana had modernised more in the 30 years since the communists gave up then the UK has modernised in three times the time. He blamed corruption for all any any ills. We blamed bureaucracy, liberal lawyers and nimbys for our problems. Personally if corruption gets the big projects completed that fast and impressively - I'll take corruption over bureaucrats!
The following day the more intrepid members had a really enjoyable cycling tour of the city, going further out and further round this time.
Before heading out to the sticks for a traditional Albanian dinner at an old army base in the countryside.
The following day was a beach day in Albanian's top end resort of Golem, a bit up from Benidorm. Albanian is quite 1970's in its development. We started with lunch (as ever) in a trendy beach club and enjoyed a really good lunch where we must have impressed the waiter with our ability to down vast quantities of their finest wines. I guess this because the waiter himself then suggested 'shots'. Bellie added to the impression we actually wanted shots, which most of us didn't (Mannequin Pis alert 2) So shots it was!
We started with a large Raki each, which everyone downed. Then unbidden, the waiter bought over another round of Vodka and somethings, which most of us downed. Then the bloody waiter, who was downing shots with us, went off and bought back a massive tray of large Jamisons Whiskey shots. Jamisons costs a fortune in the UK, and as the wine at this restaurant (Ayo Beach Club) was £80 a bottle my over-charge sensors were going crazy. Just how much was this lot going to cost?????
Tony seemed unconcerned by the cost as he was caught emptying high end whiskey shots onto the floor between his legs (Mannequin Pis alert 3). At this point we asked for our bill........................... Amazingly the shots, some 50 or so, which in the UK would have come to at least £5 a shot, £250-300, were on the house!!! Love those Albanians!!!
The next day was a range day followed by the AGM dinner (or late lunch as it ended up after an impassioned plea by Bellie, as he falls asleep around 8pm and so dinner is a stretch for him nowadays).
So off we trotted to the shooting range in a modern complex near our hotel. Arrived, up to the desk, only to be told that we all needed passports or driving licences. Now I had done a recce weeks earlier and actually they had told me this, but as I always carry ID I had forgotten! (Mannequin Pis alert 4). Some members trotted off to get theirs from the hotel, then thought 'fuck it' and went to lie by the pool. Andy decided that he could charm the lady behind the till with photos of his passport on his phone. She said no!, he smiled beguilingly, she said no, he fluttered his Andy Burnham eyelashes, and she melted, and we were IN!
Great weapons, good shooting by all. But the star of the show was RON. The phrase of the day was 'don't fuck with the accountant!'.
Then it was on to ERA, our AGM venue. private room as, along with most restaurants in Tirana, they were packed even on a Monday!
We looked the part in our Albanian hats and had a great evening.
It was a blessing that we were in a private room, when we arrived at 6.00 the place was quiet, unlike us, who were noisy, sweary and by the end of the evening, drunk! The waiters, who were a bit glum at first, soon fell in with the general merrirment and by the end of the evening we laughing along with us (or at us, who cares?). As we staggered out we realised that whilst we had been carousing, the restaurant had filled to the gills, on a flipping Monday, packed!! Lucky we were closeted away from the nice Albanian people. Great meeting. Details below.
Then it was back on the town in Bloku, the trendy area next to the hotel. Ready for a quite reasonable departure time of 9.00am. Ron of course missed that by 10 minutes (Mannequin Pis alert 5).
Off to the airport and passing the automatic barriers with boarding cards on our phones. Andy (eyelash Andy of charming the lady at the range fame) had done yet anothet nice thing, what a guy! Because Len is a digital knobhead and could not figure out how to get his boarding pass on his phone, Andy had taken the precaution of downloading Len's as well as his own. PROBLEM - Andy's surname is SMITH, Len's surname is - you guessed it, SMITH. Andy did not foresee this potential conflict and so used Len's ticket to enter the airport security area. Len, unsurprisingly was then blanked! Andy sorted that one out without too much kerfuffle. Lesson learnt.
Not!. At the boarding gate Andy, for reasons best known to himself, once again checked himself through as Len. Len then checked himself through as Len too. We-Waugh, We-Waugh, alarms sounded. Len was halted mid wobble. Massive queue halted. Andy was thankfully only yards away and tumbled to the fact that he had fucked up again! A long and involved explanation, involving Andy holding his passport beside his face and pleading "Look, this IS me!". Finally Len was allowed through. Finally we have the new owner of the Mannequin Pis, sorry Tony, last minute change (but only of the rules allow it as we were off the bus!).
The rest of the homeward bound joureny was on time and a fitting end to a great weekend away. Well done GASS members for making so few errors and cock-ups, and for generally being wise, sensible and logical - oh how I pine for the old days when things went wrong from start to finish!! here's to next year!!
THE MINUTES OF THE ANNUAL GENERAL MEETING 2026
This was a well conducted meeting
covering mainly the pressing issue of GASS OVERSPENDING.
ELECTION OF OFFICERS: This went pretty smoothly. The only hiccup was a mild attempt by Owen to wriggle out of the post of Chairman by suggesting the flip-flop nija for the post, but as Wayne was in no way volunteering we decided to stick with Owen, who graciously accepted the mantle for another year, as did Ron and Brian.
FINANCIAL REPORT: Due to both a reduction in members and last years AGM decision to increase spending on each meeting, these two factors combined to produce a loss of £1,917, reducing the cash fund to £3,972. Ron pointed out that at that rate we'd be broke in two years, not what the members wanted.
During the day a whole raft of daft, potentially unworkable, some downright unfair, some just insane, suggestions were floated to overcome the issue. I won't bother to list them here. Suffice it to say the most sensible came from Phil. For those members that were not present please just accept that a whole host of ideas were discussed, but that this one, and its back-up logic, got a unanimous vote in favour for 2026/7.
THE ISSUES NEEDING SOLVING ARE TWOFOLD.
ISSSUE 1: We are drawing to much money from the fund. Our income from 19 members is £9,100. Currently we pay out £11,900. A £2,800 annual overspend. We must reduce the physical amount of money Ron hands out each month.
ISSUE 2: Meetings cannot be funded from even the current budget. So we need to reduce the pressure on GASS funds at each meeting to make organisers jobs easier. The meetings allowance needs to be spent on less things.
Phil came up with two solutions.
ISSUE 1: Reduce the money allocated to each meeting to £900.
Meetings are still PUB, ENTERTAINMENT and AWAYDAY, but each get £900. The balance of any cost is made up from a surcharge as appropriate.
OUTCOME: The GASS fund pays out £9,900 from the £9,100 annual income. Still an annual deficit £800, but we'd hope for some funds being returned from cheaper meetings, so we can live with that.
FAIRNESS: This means no increase in fees (which would have had to rise to £55-£60 a month) so the fee stays at £40 and is basically the cost of membership. It is NOT the full cost of meetings attendance. That means that those that attend the meetings pay more than those that can't make it. SO EXPECT TO PAY SOME SORT OF SURCHARGE EVERY TIME FROM NOW ON WHEN YOU ATTEND A MEETING.
ISSUE 2: Wine will no longer be paid for from GASS funds.
All beers, normal spirits (not sherry) and soft drinks are on the GASS bill all evening. If you want wine at the table you buy your own. By the glass, bottle or hogshead, YOU BUY YOUR OWN WINE. This will take a lot of pressure off the meetings bill.
OUTCOME: Organisers get £900 given to them. They have to estimate the meeting cost and put their guesstimate of a surcharge on the GASS Whatsapp beforehand. If you attend the meeting you pay the surcharge. Any funds left over go back to Ron, if there is a shortfall then a quick whip round is in order.
FAIRNESS: It will mean that those that don't drink so much at meetings are not subsidising those that do to the current level any more. Those that want decent wine with their meal can have it. Wine always makes up a disproportionate amount of the dinner bill and has been a regular source of discontent - this change kills two birds with one stone. FROM NOW ON THE GASS BILL DOES NOT PAY FOR ANY WINE AT THE TABLE.
GUESTS AT MEETINGS
It was agreed that whilst we are no seeking out new members, if a perfect person turned up there is no outright ban. On that basis GUESTS were welcome to attend our meetings. The cost of a guest is fixed at £50 plus the meeting surcharge. Paid by the member inviting the guest.
MEETING ORGANISERS 2026-27
The draw was held to decide organiser teams for the coming year and the outcome is below. Note: We only have 19 names and for 11 months we have 22 slots, so I have added myself in as helper where only one name for a month was drawn out of the hat.
OCTOBER - IAN/GARY - PUB
NOVEMBER - ANDY/WAYNE - ENTERTAINMENT
DECEMBER - OWEN/RON - XMAS
JANUARY - LEN/JOHN - PUB
FEBRUARY - STEVE/BRIAN - ENTERTAINMENT
MARCH - NICK/PHIL AWAYDAY
APRIL - HIGH/STUART - PUB
MAY - RAY/PETE - ENTERTAINMENT
JUNE - CHRIS/BRIAN - AWAYDAY
JULY - GRAHAM/BRIAN - ENTERTAINMENT
AUGUST - TONY - PUB
SEPTEMBER - AGM
ANY PROBLEMS - Let Brian know and we will sort it out.
SOME ENTERTAINMENT IDEAS SUGGESTED AT THE AGM -
STAND UP COMEDIAN - all GASS members have to tell one joke.
CATAPULT COMPETITION - target shooting.
AN OLD SCHOOL DINNER - dressed as we used to in the 80's, in sport jackets and GASS ties.
PAINT GUN DUEL - One paint gun each, walk 20 steps, turn and fire!
LAST PERSON TO LAUGH - Same as the TV show.
AFTER DINNER SPEAKER - Get a decent speaker on an interesting subject.
POOL & DARTS - In Rainham somewhere, is there a place?
REMEMBER - You get £900 for your meeting. At the end of the meeting you are responsible for submitting a quick account to Ron and to return any funds unused promptly. If the meeting costs more than £900 you charge a surcharge, and if necessary have a whip round at the end or pay the excess yourself.
You need to factor in all drinks at the bar, all entertainment, and all food. That is the meeting cost. Wine at the table is no longer part of your budget, members pay for that themselves, although be aware they can still order beers and other bar drinks on the tab at the table, only wine is excluded.
AND THAT IS ABOUT THAT FOLKS. ANOTHER YEAR- ANOTHER AGM.
I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO NEXT YEAR ALREADY!
AND NOW SOME MEETING IDEAS FROM CHATGPT
I gave ChatGPT the list of our meetings over the years and asked for new ideas. Here is what it came up with....
Yes — you've already done an exceptionally broad range of activities, so I would avoid simply suggesting more versions of things you've already done (another karting evening, another casino, another tasting, etc.).
Looking through your list, there are still some quite different experiences that could work particularly well for a group of 20 in the North Kent / Medway / Maidstone area, with London and the wider South East accessible.
Ideas I'd investigate first
Idea | What you'd actually do | Why it could work |
1. Fireboat experience on the Thames | Ride on a working/heritage fireboat and see the river from a completely different perspective | Unusual and very social |
2. Private brewery takeover – brewing your own beer | Split into teams and actually brew beer, with tasting afterwards | Builds on your beer visits but is much more hands-on |
3. Blacksmithing day | Forge a knife, bottle opener, poker or other object | Very different from anything on your list |
4. Glassblowing | Work with a glass artist and make your own piece | Excellent group experience |
5. RIB Thames speedboat challenge | Teams compete in navigation/time challenges on the Thames | Combines boats, speed and competition |
6. Vintage aircraft flying experience | Group visit followed by individual flights in historic aircraft | Particularly good for a group interested in machinery |
7. Private steam train driving experience | Visit a heritage railway and, where available, have a go at driving/operating a locomotive | Memorable and very different |
8. Fish-and-chip trawler/fishing trip | Charter a fishing boat and have a competitive fishing day | Particularly easy to combine with dinner |
9. Forensic investigation evening | Crime-scene investigation, fingerprints, evidence and solving a staged crime | Similar spirit to your police museum but much more interactive |
10. Lock-picking / escape engineering workshop | Learn the mechanics of locks and attempt increasingly difficult challenges | Great for competitive groups |
11. Private whisky blending session | Create your own whisky blend and take bottles home | More sophisticated than a conventional tasting |
12. Sausage-making competition | Teams make sausages from scratch, judged blind afterwards | Very good fun for 20 |
13. Oyster farming / oyster shucking | Visit an oyster farm, learn about production and compete at shucking | Very different and potentially excellent around Kent/Essex |
14. Bell-ringing competition | You've done church bell ringing, but a proper team competition could make it completely different | Surprisingly competitive |
15. Medieval combat experience | Armour, shields and controlled medieval combat | A natural extension of your jousting/sword activities |
16. Hovercraft experience | Drive/operate a hovercraft and race against the others | Highly unusual |
17. Steam engine / traction-engine driving | Learn to operate a vintage traction engine | Very "boys' day out" and unusual |
18. Private auction-room evening | Professional auctioneer teaches bidding, valuation and auction tactics; teams bid with fictitious money | Particularly suited to businessmen |
19. Property development challenge | Teams are given a fictitious property and budget and compete to produce the best development scheme | Plays to your group's business background |
20. Dragon-boat racing | Teams of 10 race each other | Perfect for 20 people and genuinely competitive |
21. Blind wine-blending challenge | Teams create a wine blend from several components and have it judged | Different from ordinary wine tasting |
22. Survival challenge | Fire lighting, shelter building, navigation, water purification and outdoor cooking | Much more memorable than another conventional activity |
23. Gold panning / prospecting day | Learn prospecting techniques and compete for the biggest "find" | Quirky and different |
24. Traditional boat-building workshop | Teams construct or assemble something that is then tested on water | Excellent team activity |
25. Private railway signal-box experience | Learn to operate signals, points and railway procedures | Fascinating for a group that has already enjoyed railways |
26. Crane / heavy machinery challenge | Operate different pieces of plant under supervision and compete for accuracy | Very compatible with your JCB/digger interests without repeating them |
27. Professional auctioneer evening | Teams receive £1,000 of imaginary money and bid against one another on unusual lots | Could become extremely competitive |
28. Cocktail chemistry / molecular gastronomy | Make unusual cocktails and food using liquid nitrogen, smoke, foams etc. | Different from your previous cocktail masterclass |
29. Black-tie murder mystery | Dinner with professionally acted characters and a murder to solve | Works particularly well with 20 |
30. Private London Underground tour | Behind-the-scenes access to historic/closed railway infrastructure | Excellent "you can't normally do this" experience |
A few more unusual ones
These are the sort of activities I'd particularly consider because your group seems to enjoy slightly eccentric, competitive and memorable experiences:
Sheepdog trial — each team learns to work with a trained sheepdog.
Falconry hunting simulation rather than another static falconry display.
Traditional pole-lathe woodturning — everyone makes something to take home.
Cooperage — make or repair an oak barrel.
Cigar rolling masterclass — with a proper Cuban/Latin American cigar expert.
Leatherworking — make your own belt, wallet or briefcase.
Knife-forging workshop — considerably more hands-on than your knife-throwing evening.
Gin distilling workshop — each person creates his own gin recipe.
Cheese-making competition.
Bread/pizza oven building — teams construct and then use their own oven.
Traditional sailboat racing.
Thames lock-keeper experience.
Canal narrowboat challenge — teams navigate a boat through locks.
Dartford Crossing / Thames tunnel engineering visit.
Quarry blasting/engineering demonstration — where public access can be arranged.
Private fire-station experience — appliance, hose and rescue challenges.
Professional stunt-driving course.
Rally co-driver experience.
Off-road motorcycle trial.
Trial-bike team competition.
Land-yacht racing on a beach.
Kite-buggy racing.
Powerboat navigation challenge.
Sailing yacht match race.
Crab-catching / coastal foraging competition.
Traditional English cider-making workshop.
Chocolate truffle-making competition.
Professional bread-and-butter knife skills competition.
Butler/etiquette challenge — deliberately done as a humorous gentleman's competition.
Pub games pentathlon — but using obscure traditional games rather than the ones you've already done.
World record attempt — choose something achievable for 20 people and try to establish a group record.
One idea I particularly like for your group
"The Businessmen's Challenge Day"
Rather than one activity, make the evening/day a five-event competition, with teams of four.
For example:
Mini excavator precision challenge
Blind wine/whisky identification
Auction bidding challenge
Navigation/logic challenge
Driving or boat challenge
Keep a running league table throughout the year. The winning team gets a proper trophy at your December dinner.
That would give you something different from your existing individual evenings, while making use of the competitive nature of many of your previous activities.
HOW IS THAT FOR SOME IDEAS??????
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